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Better living through animals
By Gina Spadafori
August 13, 2010
I’m sitting here waiting for the phone to ring, trying to take a surgeon out to lunch next month for our 10-year anniversary. I haven’t talked to him in eight years, two years after I had gastric bypass surgery.
At the time of surgery, I weighed 450 pounds, but I was already on the road to health, thanks to … my animals.
Before I ever considered surgery, I got a big, active dog. Now, I’d grown up with big dogs, but hadn’t had one all my adult life — I’d had Shelties (and still do have one, of course: The handsome and debonair Drew). With the addition of my first flatcoated retriever, my beloved Ben (died 2005), I suddenly found myself with an active, working dog who needed an active, engaged owner.
I started taking exercise classes so I could exercise my dog. And then I got the amazing Queen Heather (died 2009) , and had to up the ante for an even more active retriever than Ben was.
One thing led to another, and I decided to have the surgery. I lost close to 250 pounds, and while still not thin by anyone’s imagination, I quickly found I could do so much more, and I wanted to do more still.
About this time I met Christie, who’d also struggled with weight her whole life. We were both working for the Pet Care Forum on AOL, and then when VIN left AOL, we kept working for VIN. We started talking, between ourselves and with others, mostly middle-aged woman like we were and still are, about how we did everything for our pets — exercise, good food, best medical care — and yet neglected ourselves. The situation isn’t restricted to pet-owners, of course: Many a woman runs herself into the ground caring for children and a husband, and later, often parents.
We tried to start doing something about it, and we largely have, with set-backs along the way. While we’ve mostly kept our weight off — Christie lost hers on Atkins, not surgery — sometimes our busy lives got in the way of our best intentions. But we soldiered on.
Our pets still always got the best, but giving ourselves as good as we gave? It’s harder than we realized.
A couple years ago I got an assignment at work (when I still had the day job) to write a blog about “living greenly,” to go with a new eco-conscious web portal (since killed by agency budget cuts in the sucky economy). I dutifully hung out my laundry, left my car behind on the commute a day or two a week, bought less, adjustment my thermostat to use less energy — and started to cook for myself and the dogs from scratch — no processed food, no take-away, no junk food, and as local as I could find it. And I wrote about it all.
I was surprised when after years at the same weight, I started losing again, very slowly. But with the encouragement of my active retrievers (Ben was gone, Heather in decline, but Woody and McKenzie were more than active enough), I got even more active myself.
And I set a goal: To own a horse, and ride again.
These days I work out three days a week, and I just started riding two days a week. Most days I also walk the dogs, a couple miles along the river trails near my home. My dogs (add in FayBee, crazy retriever No. 3) need to be active, and still, I follow their lead. We all eat better, and I am still cooking for us, from scratch.
This morning I went out to meet a friend at Nighthorse Farm. She has been riding and training there for a few years, and she recommended the place when I asked her if she knew a good barn for an older quasi-beginner to start. So far (and I’m not expecting a change) the place has been everything I’d hoped for: Thorough, knowledgeable trainers and staff, a clean barn with no smell or flies, and happy, relaxed and friendly horses in great working condition.
Within the next year, I’ll own a horse at last. Before that, I need to learn more, and get even more fit and strong, which means I’ll be losing a little more weight and continuing to workout regularly, cooking for myself and my dogs and taking long walks with the pack to keep us all happy, relaxed and motivated.
I’m not sure where I’d be without my dogs, but I’m pretty sure it’s not where I am.
And for that, I owe them.
So next month (Sept. 10) as I celebrate the 10-year-anniversary of my surgery, I will thank the doctor who played a big role in my life change, but the fact is the bigger credit goes to my big dogs, who introduced me to the joy of an active, healthy life and then helped me learn how to live it and love it.
Images … Top: Ben and Heather, 2001, in the backyard of the house I owned then. (They were also the reason I moved and bought a house with a quarter-acre!) Middle: McKenzie, third of my crazy-active retrievers. Yes, she walks on water. Bottom: Charlie, who is now helping me learn to ride again, after a gap of many, many years.
Update: Another view of Charlie, for those who asked:
.
If he weren’t beloved by his owner (who allows the occasional beginner to ride him under the supervision of the riding instructors), I would be taking him home. He is a sweet, patient horse with easy gaits.
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Yeah, good for you!
Comment by Liz Palika — August 13, 2010 @ 4:58 pm
teared up reading this - your honesty and your love for your animals so beautifully written…. just have to say you are very special Gina Spadafori.
Comment by mary frances — August 13, 2010 @ 5:02 pm
I’ve been thinking about your post. My animals - primarily dogs but also cats and reptiles - are a vital part of my life.
All of my friends have animals and those people I know who don’t have animals aren’t close friends. We just don’t have much to talk about.
My dogs keep me company, make me laugh, make sure I take time to play, get me away from the computer to exercise, and are both of my professions.
I can’t imagine life without my dogs.
Comment by Liz Palika — August 13, 2010 @ 5:05 pm
I teared up too. This is probably the most beautiful blog post I’ve ever read.
Comment by Mary Mary — August 13, 2010 @ 5:06 pm
Gina, you go, girl!
Comment by VJ — August 13, 2010 @ 5:13 pm
You are amazing.
Comment by Verde — August 13, 2010 @ 5:19 pm
Happy Anniversary ! We always do more for our human & pet family members than for ourselves.
Comment by Leslie K — August 13, 2010 @ 5:56 pm
This reminds me that I have been reading your writing for a very long time, in one place or another online. I offer a toast to you and your health, and to many more years of writing that I can enjoy reading!
Comment by keenwell — August 13, 2010 @ 6:06 pm
Beautiful, and inspirational, post.
I can’t imagine living a life without animals in it. They truly do change our lives, often in ways we never could have imagined.
Comment by Ingrid King — August 13, 2010 @ 6:07 pm
Brava! A truly wonderful post, and another few reasons to admire my friend Gina.
Comment by David — August 13, 2010 @ 6:08 pm
Your anniversary is the same date as my birthday.
Comment by Amy — August 13, 2010 @ 6:35 pm
I saw my sister suffer from obesity at 260 lbs.
My mother was close to 200 lbs.
My sister died at 49 years of age because of health complications.
Myself, I could not get the very best guys because I was maybe 10 lbs. overweight! They wanted thin, thin wives.
My son had to marry a Taiwannese girl to be sure that he got a thin wife :). She sure makes me look blubberish at my 133 lbs. However, she is a wonderful wife to him so I forgive her showing me up.
You had great strength and courage to make your life better. Thanks for sharing. It is a wonderful tale you tell.
To me, animals make life worth living for. I will quicker take care of my animals that myself or my husband—unless forced to do otherwise. Non-animal people might wonder about my sanity but I feel safe saying it here.
Comment by Evelyn — August 13, 2010 @ 7:12 pm
Congratulations, Gina, on a decade well lived!
Funny, how our animals shape our lives; almost always for the better. My crew, save one, are all rescues. But just who rescued whom remains an unanswered question.
And OMG, is that Charlie a cutie, or what?
Comment by Rori — August 13, 2010 @ 7:52 pm
You go girl!! What an awesome story. I don’t know what I would do without my dogs. They have helped me through more than I ever thought they could. The power of paws!!
Comment by Jill — August 13, 2010 @ 8:13 pm
Evelyn wrote:
Er, those were the “very best guys”? Shallow a-holes? Sure am glad I’m a lesbian and don’t have to put up with that kind of crap!
Comment by Christie Keith — August 13, 2010 @ 9:19 pm
Hooray and congrats, Gina! And I’m with you - my dogs and cats have saved my life before, too. I figure the least I can do is return the favor.
Comment by LauraL — August 13, 2010 @ 9:53 pm
Yes, let’s hear it for big dogs!
I feel the same way. For me, it’s not so much weight control (tho there is that) as it it is mental health. Even though I was going to the gym, it wasn’t until I added walking into my routine that I started feeling better, mentally.
Loved your story; now, you need to write a book about exercise and dogs!
Comment by KathyF — August 13, 2010 @ 10:33 pm
Love your post, but then I love any post that mentions dear Ben. :-) And I love Christie’s comment.
Comment by Debbie — August 13, 2010 @ 11:01 pm
Great post Gina! I did similar thing, only a little more twisted than you. When i adopted Charlee 11 years ago, I joked to people that I adopted the thinnest dog because people looked like their dogs and I wanted to look like her. She was fit, trim, and lithe for about a year until she developed a life long thyroid issue, then I was “big boned”, and she was “poofy” with extra fur and a few extra pounds from her out of whack thyroid. Now as she is nearing the end of the trail, she is thin, and lost all that extra fur I want my poofy dog back.
Comment by Nancy Freedman-Smith — August 14, 2010 @ 3:01 am
Loved the honesty and sincerity and, well, love in this post, Gina. Like many others here, I have a similar story. Eleven and a half years ago, I brought my first Scottie into my life, fulfilling a near lifelong dream. I had not had a dog since childhood, had always lived in metropolises, had always traveled, had always had high pressure jobs. Thirteen years ago, we moved to the country to escape all this, and also to live in a place where we could have dogs, lots of dogs. Mr. Holmes was a wonderful, well bred pup, but around the time he turned a year old, he became chronically, desperately ill. His problems were many, and as we took him from specialist to specialist, everything we did for him seemed to make him worse. This situation went on for years. And then I started investigating holistic living, started reading Christie on the Net, started a whole new method of husbandry with Holmes and my other Scots. He got well. It was a miracle. Then I was diagnosed with breast cancer. Because of the education I had gained in my effort to cure my dog, I knew how to care for myself. That was six years ago. I still read Christie whenever and wherever I can—after all, she led me to this wonderful blog, where I have continued to learn, and where I have come to value, and great appreciate, authenticity like yours, Gina. Thank you.
Lisa in Cape May County, NJ
Comment by Lisa — August 14, 2010 @ 3:56 am
Last sentence should read “greatly appreciate.” Editor, edit thyself!
Comment by Lisa — August 14, 2010 @ 4:40 am
Hip, hip, hooray for you, Gina!!!!
Comment by Miki — August 14, 2010 @ 6:11 am
Christie, you can’t imagine how it was in the 1940’s and 1950’s when if you didn’t get married, you would be branded forever as an OLD MAID! Mothers put a tremendous amount of pressure on their daughters to get married, whether it was good for said daughter or not.
So I complied like a good girl.
Comment by Evelyn — August 14, 2010 @ 6:13 am
Awesome Gina..
really enjoyed this article. I am a little short 5’ person that also has some very active hunting dogs…they too have kept me on my toes and deserve much credit for my mental and psyical health…
Comment by Mary — August 14, 2010 @ 6:25 am
Transforming our lives — it’s a choice.
I wish everyone who got an active, athletic dog would find it a wake-up call the way you did.
As it is, not one in 100 follow through.
The dogs suffer, and the human remains unhealthy. (And that’s not just about weight; you can be thin and slothful and eat crap and die young of the diseases of modern excess.)
The advertisement I hate most is for an exercise machine: starts out with fat(ish) guy and fat dog, and the dog lies on the floor watching while the time-lapse shows the guy exercising the flab off. Dog is still fat at the end. I don’t think the advertisers have any idea that the dog is fat.
I want to scream TAKE YOUR DAMNED DOG FOR A WALK, IT’S FREE!!!
Comment by H. Houlahan — August 14, 2010 @ 8:06 am
The other great thing about dogs:
I’m still waiting for a call from the surgeon.
Two calls not returned and counting …
The dogs always take my calls.
The cat checks voicemail later.
:)
Comment by Gina Spadafori — August 14, 2010 @ 8:15 am
Sure am glad I’m a lesbian and don’t have to put up with that kind of crap!
Comment by Christie Keith — August 13, 2010
I’m not a lesbian, and I don’t put up with it, either. :)
But yes, Evelyn, you grew up in a different time. You and my mom are about the same age, and I know from her that her choices in all ways were quite a bit more limited than women my age (52), or my niece’s age (20).
Comment by Gina Spadafori — August 14, 2010 @ 8:18 am
Major lump in throat … great post, Gina.
Comment by Susan — August 14, 2010 @ 8:44 am
Thanks for that, Gina.
It pleases me so much to see woman entering into the fields that we once forbidden or frowned upon, like medicine, the legal field, the CEO’s of companies, etc. On the other hand, I see more male nurses, males bank tellers, male school teachers, etc.which wasn’t the case for me growing up way back then.
I have a suspicion things are changing in vet schools where women are gaining ground in professorship numbers.
Whatever weight I may be, I’ll always feel fat. Luckily, my husband loves me whatever weight I am!
Comment by Evelyn — August 14, 2010 @ 8:59 am
Evelyn, I don’t even know what you look like at all and I love you!
You may have felt the pressures of your generation to conform and give up your own dreams, but you raised your daughter, Dr. Narda, to reach for hers — and she has.
You are a wonderful woman. :)
Comment by Gina Spadafori — August 14, 2010 @ 9:11 am
Horses and dogs, can’t get better, congrats.
Comment by Erich Riesenberg — August 14, 2010 @ 9:15 am
Tears are spoiling my non-mascara, not pancake makeup face, Gina.
Comment by Evelyn — August 14, 2010 @ 9:16 am
What a great blog, Gina! Everything I learn about you impresses me more. You make great choices for yourself. And for you, the choices were even more difficult. Some people are naturally lean. I used to be one of them. There was nothing better or more disciplined about me; truly; it was genetics. Now age is creeping up on me and it is no longer easy to stay thin. I have to consciously choose healthier habits. Kudos to you for showing both the way and the WHY!
Comment by Kelly Byam — August 14, 2010 @ 9:26 am
Tears are spoiling my non-mascara, not pancake makeup face, Gina.
Dr. Narda’s brother is equally brilliant and famous in his medical field, travelling all over the world giving medical lectures.
Raising children opposite from how I was raised was my main goal in life and it seemed to pay off handsomely with so much love received from them in return. I always said my children are my jewels.
I love your writings, your great wit, your great energy expended for animals and people and your solid ethics. I would say more if you want me to! I love you back and am so happy you started this great blog.
Besides a whole host of good reasons for enjoying this blog, you have given me the deep and meaningful way to express myself and my life travails which I never had a vehicle for before.
Comment by Evelyn — August 14, 2010 @ 9:26 am
You have given me the deep and meaningful way to express myself and my life travails which I never had a vehicle for before.
Comment by Evelyn — August 14, 2010
And YOU have made my day to say so.
See, the lesson is: Old dogs such as we are really CAN learn new tricks. :)
Comment by Gina Spadafori — August 14, 2010 @ 9:32 am
Purr—Purr—Purr—from Evelyn the Cat
Comment by Evelyn — August 14, 2010 @ 10:20 am
excellent! Very touching.
Comment by Debbie Davidson — August 14, 2010 @ 11:25 am
Brava! You go girl!
Gina, what an uplifting and important post.
I join all of you here in not being able to imagine a happy life without our dogs.
As a long-time rider and horse owner I’m thrilled to hear you’ve started riding again. Yay!
So just when did you say you’re getting that country place?
Comment by Marge — August 14, 2010 @ 12:28 pm
I’m going to stay here. Dr. Becker calls his place “Almost Heaven Ranch,” and I plan to make mine the “Almost Ranch Heaven.”
Comment by Gina Spadafori — August 14, 2010 @ 12:30 pm
Great story Gina, dogs and pets in general makes our lives full. I to had gastric by pass 5 years ago, 150 lbs later, it changed my life. I also have RA, but my St Bernard Isabella and Bassett Hound Gus make me feel less isolated from the activities of normal life. Enjoy your health and fur friends…God Bless you..for sharing.
Comment by Susan Dunnick — August 14, 2010 @ 12:37 pm
Since this post went up yesterday, I have tried to come up with something erudite and eloquent in response. I can’t. This is simply the best post I’ve read in a long while about the importance of pets in our lives. Thank you, Gina.
Comment by Deb — August 14, 2010 @ 4:06 pm
Seeing you happier and healthier than ever is wonderful, Gina, and you can feel very proud of always being positive and smart. The dogs will try to take all the credit but don’t let them. You’re the true champion in the family.
Comment by Ellie Shaw — August 14, 2010 @ 8:43 pm
Wow, awesome—thanks for sharing some of your story. I keep missing meeting you in person but look forward to the day when I get to.
Keep on keeping one!
Comment by Ark Lady — August 14, 2010 @ 10:23 pm
I keep missing meeting you in person but look forward to the day when I get to.
Comment by Ark Lady — August 14, 2010
As anyone will tell you, it’s the thrill of a lifetime … NOT!
:)
Seeing you happier and healthier than ever is wonderful, Gina, and you can feel very proud of always being positive and smart.
Comment by Ellie Shaw — August 14, 2010
Ellie is one of the best bosses I ever had, and in the 20-plus years since I worked for her she has become on of my best friends.
She has left the news biz, but works as a writer, editor and PR consultant. If you can use some help in those areas … click on her name and track her down!
Comment by Gina Spadafori — August 15, 2010 @ 6:39 am
What a great post, Gina! You’re an inspiration in many ways—as are your animals, clearly! Bigs cheers to you, the dogs, and—bien sur!—Charlie. Can’t wait ‘til you have your own, too.
Comment by Glenye Oakford — August 15, 2010 @ 7:29 am
Really nice post to read. Life is short and taking action to be as healthy as possible is critical. Your dogs inspire you to stay active and in turn you are keeping fit to enjoy them. Win-Win-Win-Win (um..how many animals do you have?) … just add a Win to them all.
Comment by ericka — August 15, 2010 @ 2:14 pm
Gina - I can completely relate to your post. I too have been overweight most of my life. Getting a dog (I have had several over the years) has made me get out more (even in cold weather!) and I am much more active as a result. I also like the idea of cooking from scratch. It makes a lot of sense and it’s healthier.
Now that I am a dog walker - I get a lot of walking in, but the food from scratch may be what I need to do next. Thank you for sharing your story. Inspiring.
Comment by Mel — August 15, 2010 @ 8:45 pm
Congratulations! I struggle with my weight as well, and probably always will. I’d been getting very complacent about it (well, it’s just who I am)until I took Kasey to his first agility class.
He’s going to be good. To do him justice I need to be able keep up—or at least make a good attempt. Started on Weight Watchers again and started working out (11 weeks minus 17 lbs). Thanks to you and my dog for the inspiration to keep going.
Comment by Original Lori — August 16, 2010 @ 8:42 am