My husband and I have been searching for a cat at 5 difft shelters now for the past 4 weeks. We only want one cat (my husband is mildly allergic - we can keep one cat bathed and vacuumed up after regularly, but not two…) and we would like one young enough that we can train it not to scratch. We are only looking at shelters; would never consider buying from a breeder. We don’t care about the breed, sex, color, anything — we just want a cat to love and have as a friend. I work from home so the cat would never be alone. We’ve read cat care books, already bought cat furniture, toys, food, a litter box, I’ve planted cat grass insde our apt, we’ve found a local vet, put screens on all our windows, covered the electrical cords, tied up all loose strings, etc. — we’re as prepared as we can be. Yet — no cat.

Why not? Well, at one shelter they said they liked me but not my husband (no explanation given as to why - they just didn’t like him) — so would not give us a cat. Another would not allow us to only adopt one — they allow adoption of 2 cats minimum, otherwise, no deal — “b/c the cat would be lonely.” I explained I work from home and would never leave the cat alone — they huffed that ” the cat knows you’re not another cat and it would be unhappy.” Another was upset at our request for a younger cat, and said if we were so worried about scratching, clearly we weren’t meant to have any animals. This statement came from the same person who — when I said I have had a pet newt for 19 years (yes, the same newt) — laughed that she accidentally boiled her newt to death by using too hot water in the bowl. But I’M the one not meant to have an animal?? Or is it just that cats are somehow the only animals worthy of love and care and, haha, newts can be boiled to death for fun?.

Another shelter we went to was about to let us put a “hold” on a cat too young to yet be neutered, but then reneged when we asked what date we’d be able to pick him up, since we will be out of town for 3 days at the end of this month, and I wanted to try to plan accordingly so we wouldn’t miss our window of time to pick him up if the surgery happened to be right on one of those days we’ll be away. They refused then to even allow us to consider adopting him at all. Another shelter wouldn’t let us adopt unless we signed a contract allowing them to come into our home, unannounced, at any time during the life of the cat, to check on its well-being. Um, I’m sorry, but I don’t let my own mother come into my house unannounced any time she wants; I’m certainly not going to give that right to a complete stranger. And no, it’s not b/c I’m planning to neglect the cat. Thinking you have the right to go into someone else’s house whenever you feel like it b/c 20 years ago they adopted a cat from your animal shelter is expecting WAY too much.

I am very close to giving up, despite the fact that I LOVE cats and have been dreaming of having my own for my whole life (since I was asked this question very snarkily by the newt-boiler: the reason I have never had my own cat until now is b/c I had a job where I was moving every year or two, to different countries around the world, and even when I was in one place for a year, I travelled most of the time. Many of the countries I lived in were developing countries where a domesticated cat would not have fared well — if it would even have been allowed in the country in the first place. For the sake of the cat, therefore, I put off adopting one until I settled down in one place with a stay-at-home job for the long term. I thought this was the responsible thing to do, but apparently not).

Anyway, all of this to say — I love animals too, very very much — That’s why I want to adopt one! It’s also why I’ve been a vegetarian for 16 years and don’t ever wear or buy fur or leather. And it breaks my hear to thear these sad stories too — that’s why I’m going to so many shelters looking to keep one from having to go through this. I just think that in their very noble efforts to care for these animals, the shelter folks can go WAY too far. Some of the shelters noted above were kill shelters — which means the shelter staff would apparently rather the cat be possibly killed, than sent to live in a loving and nuturing house — albeit a loving, nuturing “one-cat” home. Or it means the shelter staff would apparently be happier having the cat be potentially killed than adopted by my husband who for some reason they just “don’t like” (he is a relief worker in refugee camps who, after fleeing the war in Sarajevo, devoted his life and career to helping other refugees).

Honestly, it’s ridiculous. If you love these animals so much, let them be adopted by folks who will love and care for them, even if it’s only 99% perfect instead of 100% perfect. I am quite sure a cat facing death would take 99% perfect over the alternative. Or would rather 99% perfect even over the thought of spending many more months locked up in a small pen in a shelter. Can we all just please be a LITTLE more realistic here??

I also (on the same web page where the contract was found) happened to accidentally get onto a page where pictures were shown what people did to precious sheltie-girls and boys who barked and annoyed their owners.

I will not ever be the same after seeing that page.

If that is what rescue workers deal with on an on-going basis, they will always have my prayers. Some probably have Post Traumatic Stess from dealing with cruelty like that.
Shelties do bark, but they are herding dogs. I loved my girl’s bark…..and I loved being herded by her.

Don’t know how severe this next rescue’s contract will be, but we’ll see.

I feel closer to getting my Sheltie boy or girl today than I did yesterday!

An actual co-ownership, huh? Rather than a takeback clause? I guess I’d find that a bit excessive, too. And I absolutely think it’s the right thing to do to examine a copy of the adoption (or purchase, if you end up buying from a Responsible Breeder) contract before making any sort of a commitment. And you DO sound like you’re offering your prospective new dog a wonderful home.

So keep at it. I will tell you that the breeder of my Papillon is one of the tops in the breed in the world. And yet, she frequently has a rescue dog or two in her home available for adoption. These are not dogs she has taken back, but dogs that have come into her care some other way (abandoned dogs left at her vet, dogs that someone “can’t keep” any longer and asks if she can help, etc.). And I know she places them with the same care that she places any dog of her own breeding, yet without being “over the top” about it.

So they’re out there. Keep at it. And {{{hugs}}} on the loss of your Sheltie-Girl. I still miss mine, too.

The third rescue said that I have been approved also. On paper. They are happy to mail me a copy of their contract in advance of the visit to their facility.

The second rescue lady did contact me today and said she just needed some time to herself and would get back with me tomorrow. I disclosed that I had, after withdrawing my app with her, applied to the third rescue. I really don’t want to step on toes, here.

I shared with her my concerns about the joint ownership thing and told her that in my humble opinion, the rescue people were heroes, all and that after seeing some of the pictures of harmed Shelties whose owners objected to their barking on another website, I really did understand their reluctance to let go of the dogs in their care. But that I still sort of needed to be THE mom of my new dog.

I think part of my frustration is that I am still grieving for the loss of my Sheltie-Girl and I apologize to all if I sounded like a witch on wheels in my earlier post!

At the first rescue group, we arrived only to find out that the dog we wanted was “promised” to their next appointment. We are 61 and 72 years old and I got the feeling that the rescue people thought that oldsters like us should adopt an older dog. I hate turning my back on an older, or ANY dog, but our present dog has Cushings Syndrome (so did the girl who died) and might need medical intervention and expensive testing in the future….therefore, I was hoping to throw the odds in my favor that the newly adopted dog might not need a lot of veterinary care. Of course, if he/she did — we would lovingly provide…we can afford to do this.

We never made it to the second rescue, but were at the invitation stage. We had been approved on paper. It was either that I had to cancel our appointment (within hours after we made it and days before it was scheduled) because of a car problem (it was a 200+ mile trip) or else it was because I indicated I wanted to change the dog’s name (someone else who adopted from them did this and they wrote a cute story about it) or else they took umbrage at my wanting a copy of their contract to review before we completed the adoption process. Take your pick! At any rate, after supplying the rescue people with every kind of reference imagineable (including our driver’s license numbers) this gal stopped answering my e-mail. I kept taking the high road and apologized over and over. I really wanted her 3-year old female Sheltie….I just withdrew my application this morning and have just applied to a third rescue organization.

If we have problems here at the third rescue, I will ask my husband to reconsider a good breeder. We were not looking for a “bargain:” sheltie, but were looking to provide a loving home for the Sheltie of our choice who needed a good home.

If my attitude is bad, then shelter adoptions might not be for me. We’ll see. I want the dog that I select, as long as he/she will get along with my dog. I want to name the dog what I want to name her/him. I want the dog that I adopt to be MY dog and not a jointly-owned dog with the rescue….(you have got to trust someone at some point in time, and our references are impeccable) we have had three beloved dogs in 20 years of our marriage and give them the best of everything. Best food, tjhey sleep in bed with us, have the run of the house, we are retired and home most of the time. We buy brand name food and I brush teeth daily. Been with the same vet for nearly 20 years.

I will wait to see what the nest rescue says, but I admit to being sort of put off by rescues in general because of what has happened to me.

i was actually very nice and explained all about responsible breeding, although I really wanted to let her have it. For my pains, she called me back to read me out again. Needless to say I hung up.

Damned if you do…..

(Note to self: Be nicer. Click. Treat.)

At an APDT conference about 12 years ago, I went outside for a break after Karen Pryor’s talk. There was a man there with the teensiest little Yorkie. He had his dog, a brand new clicker, treats, and Karen’s book. He was trying his very best, but of course as a new clicker convert, his timing was in need of improvement.

One of Karen’s assistant trainers came out, saw the man and his dog, and sized them up in an instant. She marched over to him, and proceeded to tell him everything he was doing wrong, in great detail. Then she marched off to rejoin the conference. The man sadly picked up his dog, left the clicker sitting there, and left.

Such an upsetting scene! I tried to catch up to the “trainer” to give her a big correction, but my timing was poor and I missed my opportunity.