Trends in pet-loss: Cremations increasingly chosen
By Gina Spadafori
June 20, 2007
Jennifer Sullivan of the Seattle Times has a sensitively written and highly informative piece about the trend away from burying pets to cremating them. As always, pet trends parallel those in humans:
But about 20 years ago, Bielski noted a definite change in the attitudes of pet owners. With cremations of humans on the rise, Bielski saw the trend spreading to pets.
Pet cremation is big business across the United States, according to the International Association of Pet Cemeteries, which represents 254 of the nearly 800 pet cemeteries and crematories in the nation.
“When this industry first started it was mostly just [pet] cemeteries,” said Brenda Drown, who runs the northern New York-based association with her husband. “Right now 94 percent of our membership has cemeteries and crematories. It’s getting to be a large industry.”
Drown said pet owners opt for cremation because of the relatively low cost and it allows them to keep the ashes as a remembrance.
“Twenty years ago the option was either go into the backyard and bury the animal or the veterinarian would more or less take care of things, which would be rendering,” said Corey Gaffney, general manager of Tacoma Mausoleum & Mortuary, which started doing pet cremations in January 2006.
[...]
Each night, Petland employee Emil Bergeson places more than 3,000 pounds of animal remains into Petland’s four retorts, or incinerators, which are heated at temperatures ranging from 1,800 to 2,100 degrees. The facility also does individual cremations.
When the Montesano man returns at 6 a.m. all that remains are bone fragments. The fragments are ground into a dull gray powder, then packaged up in plastic bags to be sent back to pet owners.
Unclaimed remains, like Hansa’s, are mixed into large drums with other pets and buried in a landfill behind Fern Hill Cemetery.
Owners can have some or all of the remains packed into marble urns, wood boxes, into yard stones or even into heavy silver pendants.
Interesting that I never did anything with the remains of the pets I lost. I figured: They’re dead, so what does it matter. I was with them at the end, and that was what counted. But I, too, changed my thinking on this a few years back, and in my office now are those boxes in which the cremains are returned, just two so far, Andy (2001) and Ben (2005).
Two years ago at the Global Pet Expo tradeshow I also noticed a considerable uptick in the number of grief-related products, from urns to books to sympathy cards. All these trends point to the larger and more significant role pets play in our lives.
***
In other news:
The AVMA reports the federal government is inviting comments on the handling of the tainted pet-food scandal. … Alley Cat Allies is offering a sale on its Feral Cat Info Cards — 35 for $2 — to help in community education on trap-neuter-release efforts.
I haven’t decided what I will do with my little girl doggie when she passes - Thought of cremation and keep her ashes in an urn on the fireplace or build a little alter with her picture during better health - never to forget that she has been and always will be special.
Comment by Linda — June 20, 2007 @ 9:08 am
It may be gross to some but I always bury my friends. I wrap the body in a fine mesh, saran window screen material open slightly on both ends and place wood planks on top of the package so the weight of the soil does not crush the body. A few years later, I can recover all the bones which I keep as a memorial. Having the skeleton is the best thing for me to remember my friends by.
Comment by Gary — June 20, 2007 @ 9:25 am
Gary at 9:25 am
I have a question Gary - as I buried my cat in my yard and worry that I might need to dig her up when I move - etc. as I wouldn’t want to abandon her. The idea of facing her bones bothered me - now I can see it in a different light - thank you. I do wonder about the hair - how long do you wait to retrieve the bones and how long does the hair stay? I fear the hair I suppose more than the bones. It’s been three years since she died.
Comment by Linda — June 20, 2007 @ 9:38 am
I have the cremains of my last two pets, Dexter Louise (cat) and Tiffany (dog). I didn’t realize until Dexie died that there’s a difference between a private cremation and a group cremation. Dexie’s ashes are just hers alone, but I suspect Tiffany’s are there with others. Regardless, they will be scattered with my ashes when I die (as will all those who are now living, but may die before I do).
My sister buried her beloved cat in her backyard and now feels as if she can’t ever move because she doesn’t want to leave him.
Comment by catmom5 — June 20, 2007 @ 10:19 am
Yes Linda, catmon5, I too thought, if I ever moved, all my dear babies would be in that yard, it would be like leaving them behind, a very sad thought.
My dad buried the first kitties in 1983 after a terrible bout with FELV where six in a row died. Back then I was very busy with work so didn’t see exactly where he buried them but I had a good idea because he said “along the fence”.
In 1997, (14 years later) I decided to try and see if I can dig them back up, so carefully began along the fence. After going down about 3 feet, I saw what appeared to be the corner of a black plastic bag, I was almost certain I found a kitty grave. Digging very carefully, I was able to see it was a trash bag bundle, the kind the vet gives you the body back in. I dug around it and soon was able to lift the bundle out of the grave, (careful!).
Placed the bundle in a large plastic tray and began uncovering the trash bag, (incredibly, the trash bag after 14 years was still pliable and could be used except for a few large holes) Inside the bag was all bones and hair. The bones and hair had taken on a light tan appearance and it was impossible to tell the original hair color. This made id’ing the kitty very difficult except for some very faint markings.
I don’t know exactly how long you have to leave the body buried until it’s reduced to just hair and bones, I imagine a couple years or so. The body Linda, is perfectly clean, no smell at all except for the musty smell of the soil and all the bones needed was a light toothbrushing in water.
One distressing thing was the loss of the smaller bones, like in the feet and spine. This why the saran wrapping, I’m hoping it will contain all the bones. I recovered four skeletons but couldn’t find any more without digging up the whole yard down to 3 plus feet. The neighbors thought for sure, I’d finally gone over the edge.
Comment by Gary — June 20, 2007 @ 10:35 am
I just called a pet cremation business for my little girl dog when she passes. For a private one, which I would want, the prices seem reasonable. But I did find out that they will freeze her little body first, and that is done to lessen the smoke, and I suppose the hardest part is thinking of bringing her body there. She can be cremated with her blanket and toys. I can’t imagine carrying her there - makes me cry just thinking about it - what a sad time it will be.
They will pick up also, but I wouldn’t want that. I’ll try to be strong.
Comment by Linda — June 20, 2007 @ 10:35 am
Later on, I learned, you can use a special beetle that will reduce a body down to the bones. I guess a taxidermist might know.
Comment by Gary — June 20, 2007 @ 10:39 am
Thank you Gary. Your explanation was and is so helpful. I won’t be afraid now when and if I need to dig him up. I also buried my little canary - I wouldn’t want to leave either of them behind.
Comment by Linda — June 20, 2007 @ 10:41 am
We had both our dogs cremated last year (smae cancer 7 months apart). It was private cremation and the owners were wonderful to work with. The work with private parties like us and some vet offices for both private and group cremations. It was about $165 each and I was able to go back the next day to get them. I had the option to stay but couldn’t do that due to kids at home. Both times they let me put them in the retort and I brought their favorite toy. a
All in all I felt it was a very professional operation.
matt
Comment by matt — June 20, 2007 @ 10:45 am
50% of all dogs die from Cancer - can’t help but think it is the dog food. Seems so high. And my Angie is only about 12 years old. I say 12 because I adopted her from the SPCA when she was about 7 months old.
I never knew so many dogs get cancer. I’m trying to heal her with diet etc. Don’t know if it will help now but I hope it will extend her life. She is in a stage three.
Comment by Linda — June 20, 2007 @ 10:49 am
Two of my dogs were cremated individually and two others in a “group” cremation. They were just too large to bury in the area in which I live. I have read, however, that the pet cremation business is rife with deceit and that one can never be sure that the cremains one gets back are actually their pets. I guess all we can really do is love and protect them while they’re with us, comfort them at the end, and hope to see them again at the rainbow bridge.
Comment by elizabeth R. — June 20, 2007 @ 10:54 am
Before I take my Angie in, I will do a ceremony to send her spirit to heaven and have all my other days stand watch to make sure she is safely in God’s arms before I take her body in. I will burn sage and incense and light candles and usher her spirit up. I hope the moon is full that night.
Comment by Linda — June 20, 2007 @ 10:56 am
Matt, thanks for your post. You are fortunate that when you needed them you were able to work with the pet crematorium in such a personal and assured way. I have not seen that opportunity here although based on your comments I plan to do a little investigation for future reference.
Comment by elizabeth R. — June 20, 2007 @ 11:00 am
Gary’s idea is becoming more attractive after Elizabeths comment at 10:54. I need my Angie’s ashes to be my Angie - sorry but I just do.
Burying is not that easy as she weighs 43 pounds now and the earth around my house is nothing but hard clay and one can only dig down about two feet max. The other dogs will dig her up unless she is protected in some way. Plastic wrap won’t do it - as dogs smell through plastic.
Comment by Linda — June 20, 2007 @ 11:01 am
My mother-in-law just lost 2 dogs a few months apart and had them cremated. She is making a rock garden in the back yard to put their remains in as sort of a shrine. She was very impressed with the people who took care of this for her. She did have them both PTS at the vet and the company came to pick them up. She wasn’t sure about it, but the first phone call she received didn’t say “We have your dog”, but “We have Duchess, what are you wishes…” which made her feel very good. They also gave her a copy of the rainbow bridge poem and a rose when she came to pick her up and were very professional as one would be for the loss of any companion, human or animal.
Comment by Amara — June 20, 2007 @ 11:07 am
When my bird died at home, I brought her into the vet clinic and they took care of the cremation and called me when the ashes were back and ready to be picked up. So I believe you can go through the vet office even if your pet hasn’t died there, and that may be easier for some people than dealing directly with the crematorium.
Comment by The OTHER Pat — June 20, 2007 @ 11:09 am
The Other Pat comment 11:09: thank you for this suggestion. I will give them a call. I didn’t realize that one could cremate a bird. Nice to know.
Comment by Linda — June 20, 2007 @ 11:12 am
I do know of people who, when they moved, had pet remains dug up, cremated and moved with them.
There are people in the world who don’t get upset by such things. With some asking around, you might find someone willing to dig up the remains for a fee and bag them either for re-burial or delivery to a crematorium.
Comment by Gina Spadafori — June 20, 2007 @ 11:31 am
When I had my beloved Lab put to sleep a couple of years ago, at that time I didn’t think I could deal with having her ashes with me. So I just left her body with the vet. Big mistake. I’ve been kicking myself ever since….I’m so sorry I don’t have her ashes with me.
She was 80 lbs & I only have a tiny yard so there was no way I could bring her back to bury her. There isn’t anything I can do about it now but it’s the worst decision I have ever made. Live & learn.
Comment by JanC — June 20, 2007 @ 11:41 am
My original plan after digging up the remains was to place the bones arranged in order and possibly wired together and put in a frame. It’s kind of a unique thing to look upon the bones and nothing will jog the memory more. You know there is something physical still with you of your loved pet.
Comment by Gary — June 20, 2007 @ 11:47 am
Um … Gary … please tell me you’re not planning to do this with your human family members, too.
Or maybe you’re pulling our collective leg regarding keeping the skeletons of deceased pets on display?
Comment by Gina Spadafori — June 20, 2007 @ 11:51 am
Well Gina, I have no family so that let’s them off the hook. Seriously, I had considered cremation but I knew a mortician and he told me about the ashes, “are you kidding?” there’s a lot of ash in the furnace and if your lucky, you might get a smidge of your family member. Knowing I may not have the right ash bothered me about cremations.
Comment by Gary — June 20, 2007 @ 12:02 pm
Gina:
How is Miss Clara after “the big snip”? Hope she’s up & about & terrorizing you already.
Comment by JanC — June 20, 2007 @ 12:07 pm
Gina, is that your pup in the photo? Looks like my former pup’s twin.
I have my pup’s ashes - private creamation. You receive a certificate authenticating that the ashes are of your pet.
Comment by petlover — June 20, 2007 @ 12:08 pm
Under the shade of a big tree sounds like a wonerful resting place … but just a note that many counties/districts prohibit burying pets in one’s back yard so just be aware of your local laws.
Comment by Sandy — June 20, 2007 @ 12:24 pm
Not to change the subject but be sure to go over to the AVMA (link given by Gina), get the email address for FSIS & have your say about the FDA’s disgusting decision to release melachickens, melahogs & melafish for human consumption. Boy oh boy, did I ever tell them what I think!!!!!
The more who send their opinions, the better…..I know how pet parents feel about the FDA so this is your chance to sound off.
Comment by JanC — June 20, 2007 @ 12:53 pm
I heard of a woman who freeze dried her pet - now that seems a bit way out. I’ll pass on putting my pet’s skeleton together on view but saving the bones in a cedar lined box seems okay.
I think if one’s intentions is to dig the pet up later that maybe it wouldn’t be exactly breaking the law.
Comment by Linda — June 20, 2007 @ 1:21 pm
JanC comment at 11:41:
After hearing that maybe we don’t even get our pets ashes back, although we get some ashes, perhaps you can have some peace about your decision when your lab died.
I’ve found it helpful to do a ceremony at night under the moon and stars and buy a ceramic dog image, that looks like your lab, and even a photo will do, then offer up a sacred ceremony to honor your lab, tell him how much he is missed and that you regret not keeping his body but you are honoring his spirit. Then burn incense and light sage and using the smoke send your prayers up to the moon and stars, to the north, east, south and west, and tell your pet that you are keeping the ceramic dog (or create an alter with your pet’s photo)as a proxy for his body that is now ashes and dust to dust, but you will honor the love you had for him in this alter (with his photo.) Maybe this will help heal the pain of not saving his remains.
Comment by Linda — June 20, 2007 @ 1:28 pm
Gina, is that your pup in the photo? Looks like my former pup’s twin.
I have my pup’s ashes – private creamation. You receive a certificate authenticating that the ashes are of your pet.
Comment by petlover — June 20, 2007
Yes, that is my very sweet boy Ben, who died in 2005 at the age of 11. I don’t think I’ve ever known a dog with a kinder heart and gentler disposition.
Comment by Gina Spadafori — June 20, 2007 @ 1:58 pm
Sorry JanC, your beloved pet was a female.
Comment by Linda — June 20, 2007 @ 2:00 pm
Here’s an article about pet cremation fraud and questions to ask:
http://tinyurl.com/37fqmy
Comment by Linda — June 20, 2007 @ 3:00 pm
Linda, that’s a great article you found. It really does help to know these things, and know what questions to ask.
Comment by Gina Spadafori — June 20, 2007 @ 3:15 pm
I didn’t like the idea of putting my Angie in a freezer - probably had nothing to do with the smoke but more to preserve her until they get enough animals for a cremation. Being there when it takes place seems like the best idea - that way one can really tell what ashes they are getting and inspect things first.
Comment by Linda — June 20, 2007 @ 3:32 pm
The tainted pet food recalls and all the etc. recalls relating to food . The FARM ACT OF 2007 is do to be voted on next week. http://www.usda.gov/wps/portal/usdafarmbill? Please call , write or email your Senators and House members and voice your concerns about food safety. http://www.senate.gov/ http://www.house.gov/ is good way to push for enforcement of COOL, more farm subdies for organic farming and less for GMO’s. Lets insist on safe food for pets and people . NO GMO’s
People may not realize that food stamps come out of the usda budget , many times they are cut to further line the pockets of large farms and agribusinesses. If you want to see the facts on farm subsidies go to http:/www.ewg.org.
Comment by thomas — June 20, 2007 @ 4:16 pm
Linda:
I might try that. Funny you should mention a ceramic dog…..I found a beautiful Black Lab planter right after she died, put a plant in it & my heart aches every time I look at that dog.
I’m going to read that article but I think it’s sad that you don’t even know if those are really the ashes of your dog. Sort of makes you wonder about humans, doesn’t it? Do you really know whose ashes you are getting?
Anyway, I swore I’d never have another dog because it hurt so much when I lost her but seven months later I ran into an ad for my beautiful Hannah….Chocolate Lab….& I fell in love with her the minute I saw her. My Black Lab (Sasha) was the sweetest, most loving dog I’ve ever known so I didn’t think I’d ever find another dog with such a beautiful soul…..Hannah is the same sweet, loving dog with a huge heart. No matter who she meets, even if they don’t like dogs, they love Hannah. I’m very lucky to have found her…..but I still have a hole in my heart for Sasha.
A friend sent me a book called “For Every Dog An Angel” that was so beautiful & makes me cry whenever I look at it or attempt to read it.
So when people tell their stories of losing their animals, I cry along with them because I know how difficult it is. Only another animal lover would understand the depth of grief that comes with losing your companion.
Comment by JanC — June 20, 2007 @ 5:23 pm
Comment by Gary June 20, 2007 12:02pm
Gary in reference to the mortician telling you there is a lot of ashes left in the furnace. The box or bin that the dog is laid in for the cremation by law at least in my state has to be cleaned thoroughly after each use. I have seen the furnaces several times and can attest to their cleanliness.
Comment by VJ — June 20, 2007 @ 7:40 pm
On another note. I have a concern that maybe someone here can address. Two of my pets ashes are in brass urns and sealed on the bottom. My burial instructions are that all my pets ashes are to be mixed with mine for burial. Ok. Then what instructions do I give for the urns. Should I have them melted down. Because the pet’s name and dates are etched into the urns. So I would think they can’t be resold. Any ideas?
Comment by VJ — June 20, 2007 @ 7:43 pm
IMO - it is what we hold in our hearts that is most important. When a beloved passes they live forever in us.
Comment by elliott — June 20, 2007 @ 9:56 pm
VJ,
Could the urns be buried with your ashes? Hadn’t even thought about what to do with the containers . . .
Comment by catmom5 — June 21, 2007 @ 5:52 am
Gina, why does Petland (the retail store that sells puppy mill dogs —headquartered in Ohio) have 3,000 lbs. to incinerate each day? Is that where all the puppy mill dogs that don’t get sold go? Or is it a different Petland?
Comment by Deanna — June 21, 2007 @ 6:33 am
In recent years more manufacturers of human related death care products as well as licensed funeral directors have entered the pet death care market.
You can view a huge selection of cremation urns available for pets and humans at http://www.urnseller.com
Pat Mahoney
http://www.urnseller.com
http://www.allohiocremation.com
Comment by Patrick Mahoney — June 21, 2007 @ 6:34 am
The Petland mentioned in the story is a pet cemetary and crematory in the Northwest. Not related to the retailer.
Comment by Gina Spadafori — June 21, 2007 @ 6:43 am
I just hate to see a casual mention of Petland in an article about cremation without opening the Pandora’s box that is associated with the Petland name. I hadn’t heard that they are in the business of cremating pet remains. If they are and unthinking vets give them business without their clients knowing who does the cremations… ugh, I’d be disgusted to find out that I was unwittingly lining Petland’s pockets and that they were benefiting from my pet’s death.
Or the answer to my first two questions could be the even more insidious option.
Comment by Deanna — June 21, 2007 @ 6:45 am
Hi Gina,
Glad you found the article. Actually, my research for my newest book revealed the early BIG shift began with innovative services in the 1970’s which really began to take hold in the 1990’s.
In the pet loss service area there are services for turning the ashes to gems, locket storage, upscale coffins, taxidermy, freeze drying (both a little unsettling to some). A wide variety of other new products are entering the marketplace as pets move into the household as furry family members (versus the utilitarian roles they once had).
Anyway, I still encourage you and other blog readers to take a look at my blog for Blessing of the Animals (ISBN 1402729677) since I get into the trends and attempt to keep up with what I come across.
For clarity, unlike similar titles, in addition to blessings, I discuss current trends of pet loss, pet parties, mitzvahs, weddings, etc.
I still have my dog Clyde’s ashes in my office…thought I could scatter them but I was wrong. When I lost my parrot this last year I buried her.
Comment by Diana L Guerrero — June 21, 2007 @ 7:59 am
Jan C comment June 20 at 5:23 pm:
I love the names for your dogs, Sasha sounds rather musical and peppy and Hannah has a wise soul and great strength.
Sometimes when I do a ceremony for a pet that passed without loved, the kind we hear in the newspapers chained in the back yard for years and years, I gather my dogs on the back patio and place a leash and dog biscuit and toys etc. and send up an offering of love in the dog’s name - and I offer the leash for the walks the dog never took, the dog biscuit for the treats it didn’t get - but all is offered now to honor the spirit of this abused animal that has transcend the physical and is now in God’s embrace.
So too one can bring out the toys the dog played with, the blanket etc. and as you commune with your dog and talk to it and ask forgiveness for not preserving her body, I hope you will feel Sasha’s understanding and know that she accepts your offering and the cermanic dog image in the spirit of honoring her life. Because that is what we do with the ashes and the bones - it is a way to honor and treasure our pet’s life and all the good they brought to us - I firmly believe that the spirit of our pet will accept our offering and this is very healing.
Comment by Linda — June 21, 2007 @ 8:44 am
Both the cats we got after getting married are cremated. We know about the QC issues, but see the ashes as more symbolic anyway.
The plan is to use a furnace (normally used for bronze casting and for glass work) to make glass beads from the ashes and add them in our display of fossils and minerals.
Cricket liked to rub her chin on the T-Rex claw, so being a sparkling presence there seems fitting…
Comment by steve a — June 21, 2007 @ 10:25 am
I was thinking about this last night - and wished I could just put my little girl, when the times comes, on an alter, like the Native American’s have done in the past, and raise it up to the sky and just burn it while doing my own little ceremony, and I would play music of wolf howls etc or beat a drum and usher her spirit into heaven, and then not deal with her ashes being mixed with others and handled by strangers. Then I could gather her bones and put them in a cedar-lined box. If I owned a large plot of land, I would do that, but I don’t. I’m not even sure if a person could get a fire permit and go into the National Forest and then perform the ceremony… seems like a better alternative at least for me.
Even the idea of trekking up the mountains with her body would be okay – a weight of love – and then alone under the stars perform her last rite – maybe even have communion.
I just don’t want to leave the end in the hands of others – no matter how well meaning they are - seems important to do it myself.
Comment by Linda — June 21, 2007 @ 10:48 am
Here’s info on freeze drying taxidermy - I looked at the photos and the animals look so good.
http://www.petpreservations.com/faq.html
Comment by Linda — June 21, 2007 @ 11:24 am
“The Petland mentioned in the story is a pet cemetary and crematory in the Northwest. Not related to the retailer.”
Comment by Gina Spadafori — June 21, 2007 @ 6:43 am
That’s a relief. And what an unfortunate coincidence of names.
Comment by Deanna — June 21, 2007 @ 11:31 am